plummet

ack.


i sometimes crave fashion

and then the opposite ends

Despise fashion

with a capital D


i went through bereavement through Fashion Week

a little on contrary of Funeral Week for me

this destroyed me.


i sent a super spaced out message to all the people that were trying to get in touch with
as I went A.W.O.L and did not want to be found




I said this freaky shit from the top of my head and from the bottom of my heart beated out_


i don't know who i am anymore




pretty deep.

at the time


i'm better now

but it's clear that my fashion has changed it's meaning to me


it feels fabricated

a bit like arson


up in flames




my wardrobe, aplomb with patterns, colours, cuts
several new items unworn
feminine, youthful, eclectic, vintage blah
a few designer pieces by hussein chalayan

i feel this guilt

all my clothes are stacked there lifeless


i can't relate to any of this

and yet i feel this draw to fashion

some days feeling the urge to scour online for clothes i may want

searching for something to resonate with me



i hope i can make sense of all this

if i voice this

i can trace my journey


find some clarity to all this


madness?