Sunday, 28 February 2010


to me

well i think it's quite blatant anyway

my accent is british

it has been distinguished that it is easy to listen to than the southerners

as i speak 'properly' ennuciate and whereas the southerners are more relaxed and lazy when speaking

and their grammer is really bad

i find it funny strange that people comment on my accent

the australian cousin
the swedish boy
and others

and then this one

the polish guy

'are you american?'


no i am not

can you tell i'm restless

i'm churning out garbble that isn't worth reading

i apologise

feels like heaven // fiction factory

silver jews // strange victory, strange defeat

feeling blah today

probably the calm before the storm

storm being deadline tomorrow

anyway i'm having vegetable soup today

mega delighted

I'm a hardcore lover of vegetables

no joke

none of that vegetarian bullshit

someone once made a true statement that vegetarianism is a lifestyle that people opt for because they consider it cool if not for the political aspects of it

when i use to live on my own i made homemade vegetable soup everyday

it's kind of crazy thinking back

when I got home at 5am

i would cook one up

it winds me up that living at home its constant meat at the table

really winds me up, it makes me tiresome..

abit off the beaten track here but

i'm mega sleepy

i've woken up early to start the day

i lack in stamina

and i hate to hit the caffeine

which in fact i did at 9am and i have a horrible caffeine buzz nausea going on


Saturday, 27 February 2010

gossip // heavy cross (fred falke RMX)

if i was having electro indie bop sex

i would choose this

which is beyond the point because i am distracted from my work once again

what is wrong with me

its good

music makes me speed up

and pace faster faster

but very so distracted

i love this remix

is a good song to have sex to though, non?

think i am only working at speed lightning because i want to go to a house party tonight which i know it's not going to happen as I need to do finishing touches and need to be on it for the presentation on Monday

then the following days

hardcore interviews lined up

and i know when i party

i get smashed as it's been far too long

so sensible head on

have to meditate and thinking of the benefits

good for the body and sanity of my career



and deadmaus it out

and some Police dosage

the police // every little thing she does is magic


bronski beat // smalltown boy



go go go

Friday, 26 February 2010

up ii

things are on the up

(bar the workload that needs to be done for monday deadline)


i'm having a lucky day


just read my star sign as a second conscience guide

which is spooky how accurate it gets

-although mention of some work wardrobe needs a touch-up..
this thought I don't think so
I have a winner dresses that do it all time
plus, I have had far too many sporadic splurges anyway

no pennies left sigh

my career may be in the works

but ark.. don't want to speak to soon as it may all cave in

need to stay on it

but yes!

i'm so glad things are on the roll

and i'm even missing out on this mega party tomorrow night

but oh well things are looking good

have an outing sometime in early march anyway

so will make up for it

so happy

Wednesday, 24 February 2010


i really miss my friends

just looking at pictures and how they are dotted all around the world

i want to be with them

they are in such tranquility and look so happy

whereas i am here in UK

and it is bleak

and hard working making a living

its so dire


i have a friend who is leaving to travel america soon and i will miss her lots

but she will have an amazing experience

hopefully one day i will get the chance too

i hope

i hope

i hope so..



jaffa cakes

midnight deadline still hammering on

although not actually being much productive

I've already watched desperate housewives on catch-up

and now talking about how amorous jaffa cakes are


Tuesday, 23 February 2010

pissed off ii

another activity i carried out of procrastination

reading a really bolschy blog/twitter find

there was attitude, ego and cuntness

i don't know if its because i'm ill and pissed off

but i found myself scorn the twat imposed

'i'm so wild in this picture i'll pose like a loony whore and grapple myself amongst my gay chauffeurs, shit yeh, i just 'cracked my coke platter..oops i meant "mirror" oh the bright lights of London has seduced me into a crack whore affair whilst realising I am able to retreat back to homeland where my servants are at my demand anywayZ i'm a posh punk in disguise in your face' -so she says

with the high-street haircut


so fly

scorning while choking on my cheese and crackers

pissed off

i've put off what i should be doing for the whole day

and didn't get any pleasure out of it

i took a nap

which was the worst nap ever as my dad blasted his dumb 'pop' music

and i swear this effected my dream nap..

woke up feeling extremly hot n headachey

y'know and you get that 'hothead' brain numb fever feel?

also the raditors were wacked on high

i just feel all round shit

and really hacked off

Monday, 22 February 2010

i can't

i don't know anymore

i give up

can't take it anymore

sodding sodding deadline

annihilating me

sometimes when your soldering on

all i keep thinking is why

what the

what now

you what

deadlines are a killer


Sunday, 21 February 2010

not good


huge problem

my eyes really hurt

both of them

my last diagnosis was that I need to blink more

or blink properly and blink more often

straight forward diagnosis

but my eyeballs actually ache pain

really scary

i'm a fan

Ellie Goulding // Starry eyed

yadda yah

i'm wee late to come across this ear pleasing music delight

very catchy and moreish

i like the remixes

it would be mega if there was a drum n bass remix version

would run similar to Sigma // All blue



better better

sometimes heavier


A-Trak // Say Whoa (Big Nasty RMX)

makes me moving in a tripped out manner

i love bass!

Saturday, 20 February 2010


i wish my life would go by the way terry richardson presents himself in every photo he documents himself in


bright eyes censored by some tinted aviators and thumbs up

most times two thumbs up

such a positive outlook on life

with life

and that's how life should be

as to true to how it is documented

well well well

yes // owner of a lonely heart


when you really listen

like really listen

it sings

owner of a lonely heart is much better than a broken heart

thats what happens when your dazzled by the amazing rift and bass

groove tings

just sayin

terry richardson photo diary cracks me up

that is all


i'm having travel pangs

I'm wanting to be somewhere else

this may seem very out of the blue

but i feel like i need to be somewhere else

just need a thrill

something to get my pulse racing

something to challenge





New York

also found out that my dad use to live in Australia

i think it's my cue to just live a bit more

need to be somewhere else

Friday, 19 February 2010


there is this constant hate that exists in my life

its sad to say it is a relative

we don't get on

see eye to eye

I would sooner see the back of it


Thursday, 18 February 2010


I adore you

the city and town of Brighton, UK

is immense


beautiful place beautiful people

such a warm welcoming town

I visited the south for the day to meet some friends

such a must recommended destination of all

i also had this insane crazy most salivating amorous foodage of love

please picture or infatuate the vision and smell

A generous golden wedge of sweet potato and cheese feta filo pastry pie
with side vegetables of savoy cabbage and chunky herbed carrots
and an additional of complimentary dressings of tzsasiki and hummus

i crumble for this pie again


Cafe Iydea, Brighton, UK

Go see

i swoon again for some humble pie

I love Brighton and Brighton loves you


sometimes i forget my age

i see 23



but somehow

i always by law remember how long its been since i've last had sex

when i had my last kiss

who was i last with

but has it become possible i actually forget how old i am

(i kinda keep thinking I am 21 (( the odd times ehm, 19 ))

i know i know

but isn't 23 the new beauty 'IT' age

a time for when everything is acceptable

so much mature and yet still beholdeth the youth

although my age seems to have paused

excitement? i don't see none


maybees i'm underestimating this

i want bigger better things

my teens and twenteens were a riot

have i peaked?

it just seems 23 has been a bit mellow for now

i want faster


freaked out shit

peaked? non? oui?

i'll think about this one..



my social life can get back on track

my phone has been busted for a couple of days which is far too long for my liking

it was a killer not being able to reach out to people when I wanted

worst is when it seemed lots of people were trying to contact me and i hated it when it seems like i'm being rude and ignoring and not being able to get back to them

i have got THE best phone ever that money has bought

better than all those snazzy team iphones and blackberry digi crap

I have a simple €5 Nokia basic no frills mobile phone

and it is mega!

it does everything I need

after the plastic gadget crap i've put up with and the humongous amount of dollars i've spent


that is all

its mega

trust me

also i depend on my alarm on the phone to wake me up

now its back

life is back in working order

simplest thing right

make a massive difference

Wednesday, 17 February 2010


before i get some light cheated shut eye

macaroons are a delightful tastiest sensation


beautifully mellow floaty melting into infinity sweetness

you must all discover this exertion

magique fantastique

tres bien!


waking up soon

i haven't slept all night and my alarm clock just went off

it rings an hour early

before my usual morning wake-up ritual

i now have 30 minutes to try and get some sleep before starting this day

30 minutes to finish off yesterday

and forget about the troubles

or at least mask it over

i miss him terribly


well now

so this is me

i'm annoyed?

i attract ugly people

is this a valid point?

maybe it's a sign that love still rotates

and ugly people need ugly people to love too y'know

you can't control the waves directions



i speak softly about this

i think i'm missing him

i don't want to

and hating myself as i convince myself that to believe it and follow through


i fold

i really truly miss him

i've even analysed all the bad points

thinking about that bad hair cut

his bad mood swings

his tubby cute belly

how he didn't give the best hugs

and didn't kiss me enough

the last point should be the deal breaker

and i still miss him

i miss him so much

and he will never know

Over the hurdle

don't stand so close to me // The Police

the original version not the remake version 86

more jam and funk

i likes

Thursday, 4 February 2010

fat thinking

reasons why I am fat

or getting fatter

I open a bag of crisps to find they taste a bit stale

only to discover the bottom of the bag has been punctured

i was a bit disappointed to say the least

thinking what a waste!

but i continue to eat half the bag to confirm it taste shit

ehm yeh..

I open a second bag of crisps to full fill the objective

darn it

welcome to fat club


I have this huge pet peeve

I am still learning how to perfect the application of make-up

to get that 'flawless-16 year old-looking russian-beauty-porcelain' look

but also i detest putting foundation on as it makes me look plastic fantastic

i have bought shiseido and YSL foundation none of which are fantastic match for my skin tone

I have just ordered this new one from Korea

in the back of my mind that hopefully the results will transform me into a 'flawless Korean beauty'

ehm yeh right we'll see

any yo

I have these friends that are foundation junkies

you could press and make a screen print from their faces as it's got more layers than a deluxe wedding cake

it grosses me out in close speculation

when they have so much gunk

and brissles shed from her make-up brush intertwined with the paste-y layer of foundation




it really pains me that its a typical ritual of theirs and I hear my skin breaking out with blemishes just from LOOKING at their skin

another thing is the coloured contact lenses

just the infections, viruses and bacteria is way too much

especially with the involvement around the eyes

its too much

this makes me wince

and shudder

this is why at the moment I am trying for a natural beauty look

for the sake of not wanting my gag reflexes to respond to the torture my friends put to skin

eugh and i just ate a banana and i feel so wrong & violated from mentioning this

Wednesday, 3 February 2010

Rotten apples

OK, so this is the thing

there's something that I feel that if I mention it may seem a faux pas

I am almost very disappointed that i had experienced this and it became a surprise to me that this has occurred

the Japanese people in France are downright rude

with the history of fashion in Paris, the early years, the Japanese found Paris to be the place to capitalize their fashion, which at first I was so surprised to come across so many Japanese people around, whether they had a boutique or food business and remembered Paris is renowned for the Japanese and their fashion

Maybe I don't get it

but it was a resounding answer from everyone that have experienced this (me being a first timer in Paris) and friends based is Paris

French people are the rudest people ever

this defects the charisma and enchanting vision of this magical city

there is this nostalgic tension

very nonchalant and even worse the poverty and class distinction is vile

but anyhow I experienced this wrath of rudeness from the Japanese french ladies at the macaroon delicatessen, their disgusting actions which reflects there lack of courteous host skills

just floored me

the level of rudeness and the people of France has got me in a questioning loop

maybe it can't be answered

scowl faced nation they are beware

Tuesday, 2 February 2010

chick peas are lethal

I'm on a race

a race to get fit and tone up and loose the fat

being 23 there is this massive noticable difference to when I was 19 where fat would bounce off

now it bounce's with me

after walking insane amounts around Paris where I literally ended up from the end of the city to across the other side

I thought this would help tone me up

Aghast the french diet is no good for me and eating Brioche in the morning is such a killer and a magnet to my thighs

not the thighs please!

Its become more apparent with the people around having a smug celebratory of here is a picture of me in a size 6 dress

or size 4 dress this is yeh?

So i'm walking up and down steep hills

Power walks

why does this mean nothing to my body to take the hint and refine up

well it could be the near enough empty hummus tub and 4 missing pitta breads

its a vicious cycle for hummus love

hummus rocks

Monday, 1 February 2010


Lo fi fnk // Marchin In

moody goodness

no love lost

R.I.P stupid useless sony ericcson mobile phone

you were never to be the one

you were never tentative

and when I needed you the most (during Paris trip obvz)

You died on me

So inconsiderate you piece of shit

and now during the most important timing of organizing and contacting

You falter

how fucked up are you?

Goodbye & good riddance